Podcast | Mindset
Episode 27| January 20, 2024

Finding Happiness after Heartbreak w/ Irina Shehovsov

She Lost Herself in Someone Else’s Life. Then She Started Singing.

Irina Shehovsov woke up one day as a single parent to a newborn and a five-year-old, with the person she thought she would build a life with gone.

She spent close to a year in a very dark place, carrying a quiet question she could not answer: who is Irina?

She had spent so long being someone’s spouse and someone’s mom that her own name felt like a stranger’s.

Her way back started with her voice.

In this episode of the Happy Healthy Hustle Podcast, mindset and wellness coach Irina Shehovsov shares how singing, painting, and small daily habits pulled her out of the dark, why emotions need an outlet before they settle in the body, and how she rebuilt her life across four pillars.

She did not wait to feel ready. She decided she could not stay where she was.

If you have lost yourself inside a role, this conversation is a map back.

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“Singing allowed me to sing what I couldn’t speak.”

– Irina Shehovsov

Fast Skim & Timestamps

0:00 Meet Irina: Reclaiming Her Life
2:29 Her Superpower: Listening and Creating Space
3:06 Singing as the Recipe for Recovery
5:09 Creative Outlets for Emotional Release
7:08 Suddenly a Single Parent
9:56 Mel Robbins and the Five-Second Rule
11:12 The Mastermind That Opened the Door
13:01 Where Attention Goes, Energy Flows

Key Takeaways

Losing a relationship can mean losing your sense of who you are. Rebuilding identity is its own work.
Creative outlets like singing, painting, and dance let emotions move through you instead of getting stuck.
Four pillars hold a life steady: physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual health.
Build habits that sustain you rather than drain you.
The people you surround yourself with shape who you become.
Where attention goes, energy flows. What you focus on expands.

Three Petite Practice® Questions

1. What part of my identity have I tied to someone else instead of to myself?

2. Which creative outlet could I use to let an emotion move through me this week?

3. Where is my attention going right now, and is that where I want my energy to flow?

Transcript Chapters

0:00 Meet Irina: Reclaiming Her Life

[00:00:00] Irina Shehovsov: I was in a very dark place after the breakup happened. I’m a single parent, and I was living in a state of uncertainty and depression for about a year, because I had the loss of identity. I didn’t know who I was. I was someone else’s spouse, someone else’s mom, but who is Irina? I didn’t know anymore. So I decided one day that I cannot live like that any longer, and I need to change something. I didn’t know what it was, but that is how my journey started. [00:01:30] Dr. Christiane Schroeter: I’m giving a big shout out to my guest. Hello there, Irina. How are you doing? [00:01:39] Dr. Christiane Schroeter: Let me tell you about Irina Shehovsov. She is a best-selling author, mindset and wellness coach on a mission for women to feel empowered, healthy, and vibrant, uplifted to go after their dreams. She is the founder of Reclaim Your Life, an NLP trainer, a wellness and fitness coach, and a podcast host.

2:29 Her Superpower: Listening and Creating Space

[00:02:29] Dr. Christiane Schroeter: How would you summarize all these accomplishments into your superpower? [00:02:31] Irina Shehovsov: My superpower is listening and creating space for people so they feel comfortable sharing. Another one is creativity, building things from scratch that did not exist before, figuring it out as I go. I enjoy the fruits of my labor, whether it is baking, having a garden, painting, or singing. It is about exploring all the passions and creating happiness in your life.

3:06 Singing as the Recipe for Recovery

[00:03:06] Dr. Christiane Schroeter: How did you figure out that you wanted to sing? [00:03:19] Irina Shehovsov: Singing was my recipe for recovering after the breakup. I decided one day that I could not live like that any longer, and I needed to change something. I know nobody is going to come take care of me. I have to do it for myself. Singing was my way of opening up my voice. I also joined Toastmasters, which allowed me to be comfortable with being uncomfortable. Singing let me sing what I could not speak. It was a relief valve, a break from my analytical mind after twenty years in the corporate world.

5:09 Creative Outlets for Emotional Release

[00:05:09] Dr. Christiane Schroeter: The outlet for you was a creative one. It came from a point of pain, but you created something beautiful. [00:05:26] Irina Shehovsov: Painting had always been on the back burner, but I love it. Any creative outlet, whether it is Pilates, yoga, singing, or painting, lets the emotions out so they do not get stuck in the body. If we get stuck with negative emotions, they can develop into sickness. So it is important to have that kind of outlet for emotional release. [00:06:08] Dr. Christiane Schroeter: It reminds me of studies where small children cannot always verbalize their emotions, so you give them paper and a pen. You funnel the emotion into an outlet and let it leave your body.

7:08 Suddenly a Single Parent

[00:07:08] Irina Shehovsov: The biggest challenge was suddenly becoming a single parent to a newborn and a five-year-old, and not knowing what next step to take. I found out three days before my son was born that everything had changed, and three months after he was born, his dad walked away. I was reeling. I called myself a soldier at a job that never ends. I fulfilled my obligations and made sure everybody was alive, but emotionally I was not there. [00:08:39] Dr. Christiane Schroeter: For anyone who is a single parent or knows one, this is a perspective shift. You are a team of one, creating all these roles by yourself.

9:56 Mel Robbins and the Five-Second Rule

[00:09:56] Irina Shehovsov: There were many influencers along the path. The first was Mel Robbins and her five-second rule, counting backwards, five, four, three, two, one, to create a pattern interrupt in your head, and then just go. We only have about five seconds to act on a spark before the brain talks us out of it. Whether it is raising your hand in a meeting or speaking to an audience, we only have those five seconds.

11:12 The Mastermind That Opened the Door

[00:11:12] Dr. Christiane Schroeter: It sounds like you met Brendon Burchard in a live setting. [00:11:20] Irina Shehovsov: I was part of his mastermind. It was a growth summit in September of 2019. I did not have a business yet, but I had an idea, to help women like myself recover after a breakup, who feel broken, who feel their life is over. It was the first step I ever took to really invest in myself. That started my journey to a podcast, four books, courses, and a second podcast. Being surrounded by people doing big things let me see what was possible.

13:01 Where Attention Goes, Energy Flows

[00:13:01] Irina Shehovsov: When we are in despair, we focus only on what is broken instead of being grateful and finding the silver lining. Where attention goes, energy flows. What we focus on expands. When we focus on the negative, we relive the same reality over and over. I want women to realize they already have everything they need inside of them. [00:13:36] Dr. Christiane Schroeter: Where can people find you? [00:13:41] Irina Shehovsov: I am most active on Instagram at reclaim your life. My website is irinashehovsov.com. My podcast is Single Parent Success Stories, and I also have a YouTube channel called Happiness Academy and a second podcast, Reclaim Your Life with Irina. [00:14:04] Dr. Christiane Schroeter: Thank you so much, Irina.

Meet My Guest

Irina Shehovsov

Mindset & Wellness Coach, Best-Selling Author, Founder of Reclaim Your Life

Irina Shehovsov is a mindset and wellness coach, NLP trainer, and best-selling author who helps women rebuild their lives after heartbreak. Through her Reclaim Your Life work, she guides women across four pillars of health: physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual.

She hosts the podcasts Single Parent Success Stories and Reclaim Your Life with Irina, and shares recovery tools on her YouTube channel, Happiness Academy. Learn more at irinashehovsov.com.

Meet Your Host

Dr. Christiane Schroeter

TEDx Speaker & Leadership Strategist

I’m Dr. Christiane Schroeter, TEDx speaker, leadership strategist, and host of the Top 1% ranked Happy Healthy Hustle Podcast. I help leaders think clearly, speak with conviction, and take the next step during change.

About Dr. Christiane

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