Podcast | Clarity
Episode 30| March 3, 2024

Finding Calm in Chaos w/ María Tomás-Keegan

Forced Into Early Retirement, She Reinvented Herself Instead

María Tomás-Keegan spent nearly twenty years climbing in corporate marketing, quietly planning her own exit.

Then the company forced her hand. Laid off. Early retirement she never asked for.

Her first instinct was panic. Her superpower was staying calm long enough to think.

Eleven years later, she calls that layoff one of the best things that happened to her.

In this episode of the Happy Healthy Hustle Podcast, career and life coach María Tomás-Keegan shares why emotions need motion, how she reinvented herself as a coach, and the confidence quilt and personal board of directors that carry her through transitions.

Things happen for us, not to us, when we are willing to look for the silver lining.

If you are in the middle of a hard transition, this conversation is a calm voice in the chaos.

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“Emotions need motion.”

– María Tomás-Keegan

Fast Skim & Timestamps

0:00 Meet María: Calm in the Chaos
1:31 Her Superpower: Emotions Need Motion
6:18 The Layoff She Never Saw Coming
8:06 Reinventing Herself as a Coach
9:09 Why She Is Grateful for the Layoff
11:40 The Confidence Quilt
14:40 Build Your Personal Board of Directors
17:22 Friends Who Tell You the Truth

Key Takeaways

Calm is a skill. Let the initial panic settle, because emotions need motion before they can move out.
A calm mind is the environment where you can actually problem-solve and see possibilities.
Things often happen for us, not to us, when we look for the silver lining.
Build a confidence quilt from the words others use to describe you, and wear it when you feel unsure.
You are the CEO of your life. Every CEO needs a personal board of directors.
Real friends offer constructive criticism. Let it spark curiosity, not defensiveness.

Three Petite Practice® Questions

1. What emotion am I holding still that needs to move before it can settle?

2. Which words would go on my confidence quilt, and who gave them to me?

3. Who belongs on my personal board of directors, and who does not?

Transcript Chapters

0:00 Meet María: Calm in the Chaos

[00:00:00] Dr. Christiane Schroeter: Welcome back to the Happy Healthy Hustle. Today I have a special guest to share tips to boost your resilience. María, thank you for being here, please introduce yourself. [00:00:33] María Tomás-Keegan: Thank you for having me. I love your podcast and how you share what people think their superpower is and how it unfolds in their lives. I am María Tomás-Keegan, a career and life coach for professional women who are navigating transitions. We all go through a lot of them, and I have been through my share.

1:31 Her Superpower: Emotions Need Motion

[00:01:31] María Tomás-Keegan: My superpower is instilling calmness in uncertain situations. I have been told I have a calm demeanor and a soothing voice since I was young, and for a long time I dismissed it. But as a marketing leader, being a calm force when everything felt chaotic served me well. It also helped through divorce, loss, and being laid off. I learned to let the initial panic settle and let my emotions swirl, because emotions need motion, and then they can move up and out. Now I own it. It is my essence. [00:03:39] Dr. Christiane Schroeter: Emotions need motion, that is beautiful. I picture a jar of muddy water. When you stop stirring, the sediment settles, and with a calm mind you get a clearer perspective. [00:05:33] María Tomás-Keegan: When we create that calmness, that is the environment where we can problem-solve and see the possibilities clearly.

6:18 The Layoff She Never Saw Coming

[00:06:18] María Tomás-Keegan: The challenge that captured my imagination most was being laid off after nearly twenty years at my last corporate job. It came as a huge surprise, at a time when I was already planning my own exit. The company forced my hand, and I had to take early retirement. But I thought, I am not done yet, retirement is not what I want next. So I had to figure out what was right for me.

8:06 Reinventing Herself as a Coach

[00:08:06] María Tomás-Keegan: In the layoff, the company provided a career coach, and I took them up on it. I had been mentored and had therapy before, but never formally coached. It helped me sort through all the things I know how to do and focus on what I love to do. That helped me take a leap of faith and start my own coaching practice for professional women in career transitions. That was eleven years ago, and I still love bringing a calm voice into my clients’ chaos.

9:09 Why She Is Grateful for the Layoff

[00:09:09] Dr. Christiane Schroeter: Looking back, are you almost grateful it happened, because otherwise you would never have become a coach? [00:09:09] María Tomás-Keegan: Hindsight is twenty-twenty. There are almost always silver linings in every black cloud. Things happen for us, not to us, and if we change our perspective and look for the silver lining, we can almost always find one. I am grateful the company made the move, because I am not sure I would have had the courage. I got to exercise my resilience muscle again, and bouncing back is the motion we take when things are not working in our favor.

11:40 The Confidence Quilt

[00:11:40] María Tomás-Keegan: Think of a confidence quilt, made of small pieces of fabric, all different shapes and colors, with gold and silver threads. On each piece is a word people have used to describe you, awesome, helpful, confident. Put them into a cloak, and when you feel unconfident, wear it and feel the weight and the love those people created. It is a visual way to remember we are all of those pieces we have accumulated, and that is what makes us confident and resilient. [00:13:14] Dr. Christiane Schroeter: It is like a word cloud, where the word mentioned most rises to the middle. Often we are not aware of our own superpowers, so ask others what they appreciate about you.

14:40 Build Your Personal Board of Directors

[00:14:40] María Tomás-Keegan: I learned the power of association. Who you know matters, but who they know matters more. I ask clients, who do you know that I need to know? We grow through listening to others and asking advice, because we get too close to our own situation to see clearly. Surround yourself with people you trust and admire, people who believe in you. I call them your personal board of directors. We are all the CEOs of our lives, and every CEO needs a great board. [00:16:19] Dr. Christiane Schroeter: They are like rocks you cross a river on, and some rocks are slippery, so choose carefully.

17:22 Friends Who Tell You the Truth

[00:17:22] Dr. Christiane Schroeter: A true friend will also tell you when they disagree. We thrive on constructive criticism, from people who know us and love us. [00:17:59] María Tomás-Keegan: Hopefully that instills curiosity, so we examine what we want to do and make our own choice, rather than moving on blind faith. Ask good questions of your mentors, coaches, family, and friends. [00:18:50] Dr. Christiane Schroeter: A no now does not mean a no forever, sometimes it is just not the right moment. [00:19:44] María Tomás-Keegan: The best way to reach me is my website, transitionandthrivewithmaria.com. [00:19:57] Dr. Christiane Schroeter: Thank you so much, María.

Meet My Guest

María Tomás-Keegan

Career & Life Coach for Women in Transition

María Tomás-Keegan is a career and life coach for professional women navigating transitions. After nearly twenty years in corporate marketing and an unexpected layoff, she reinvented herself and has been coaching for over a decade.

She helps women find calm and clarity when life feels chaotic. Learn more at transitionandthrivewithmaria.com.

Meet Your Host

Dr. Christiane Schroeter

TEDx Speaker & Leadership Strategist

I’m Dr. Christiane Schroeter, TEDx speaker, leadership strategist, and host of the Top 1% ranked Happy Healthy Hustle Podcast. I help leaders think clearly, speak with conviction, and take the next step during change.

About Dr. Christiane

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